Success!

Here is another great success story from one of our parents, http://www.facebook.com/ParentHelpCenter

Per your direction, here is the report on how it went this weekend. Let me start by saying, it didn’t go good, it went GREAT. So great, I am still in a state of shock (In a Wonderful, Blessed Way). I felt from the moment I picked you up at the airport on 4 June, that our son needed to stay with you until he “Got it.” Well I can tell you from my heart, soul, and being….He’s GOT IT. Why does our son finally “Get IT?” It’s because “Changed Parents will see Changed Children.” He’s “Got IT,” because my wife and I finally “Get IT!” With Matt’s help, We are a team like NEVER Before. Our son senses and knows this now. He knows the ONLY way he won’t end up back with you, is, this time around he has to “Earn those Checks.” There will never again be any un-earned checks. If my wife and I would have “Got IT” the first time last summer, he probably wouldn’t be there with you now. Anyway, you had the children give their definition of 3 words on graduation day from the 30 day camp. The dictionary defines those words as follows:

Responsibility: Ability or authority to act or decide on one's own, without supervision
Trust: Reliance on the character, ability, strength, or truth of someone or something
Respect: An attitude of deference, admiration, or esteem; regard

I can state without hesitation that our son now personifies each one of those traits. Traits he’s learned and internalized from You, Mr. D, Randy, and Rick. With all of this being said, my vote is for our son to come home next Friday, and Stay. I can state without hesitation that our son proved he’s “Got it” with multiple “Tests” this weekend, “Tests” that he passed with flying colors each and every time. Of course, I am not naïve enough to think there won’t be the occasional “Slip Up.” Matt, mom and I came up with the idea (With your concurrence of course), that if our son needed a “Consequence” for poor choices, You can expect a “Volunteer” at the P-Farm if it is warranted and “Earned.” I hope and pray for your Vote for our son to come home and stay starting next Friday, 27 July 2012.

In conclusion, I wanted to end this report by stating “Why” our son is back on the road to Max’s Farm as I type. First and foremost it’s because our son, mom and I respect You, and the Parent Project, too much not have Your blessing in this decision. God’s Grace, Your hard work and relentless dedication have Saved my Family. our son and I have a “Clean Slate” with each other and a relationship we’ve never had before for two (2) main reasons…..God’s Grace and your guidance and direction. My son and I trust you. Our son talks about you with a Love and Respect that is impossible to be faked or made up. Again, proof he more than “Gets IT.” our son got in the car today, after being away from home for almost 8 weeks, with a smile on his face knowing he was trading the comforts of home for Max’s Farm. Eight weeks ago I had to fly you from Jacksonville for you to help me get him to the Farm. Today, he’s driving himself. If that is not the picture and definition of responsibility…..I don’t know what is. Thank You for taking the time to read this letter. God Bless You, Your Family, and the Parent Project. I look forward to discussing this letter with you at your earliest opportunity. Last thing….our son was very sick last night, he rallied, and is on the road right now.

Your Student Empowered Dad

The Kegg's, where Jesus is always on tap!

Hope and I would like to share an update on our ministry and work with parents. There are three areas I would like to cover that we have been doing for the past 8 months. Two are parent and family related and one is church/ministry related.

First, we are so excited to be back at Round Lake Christian Church. One of the things that Hope and I have always done is share our lives with others in order to make disciples. Now is not the time to explain all of what takes places, but as “the church” we live in Gospel-Communities on Mission.  Think of the church in groups of 8-12 scattered throughout the city, on mission for Jesus, to serve, bless, and share our lives with others. Making disciples that can make disciples. We then gather as “the church” on Sundays to celebrate what God has been doing in our lives through the week.

Since Hope and I have been back, we have seen three GC’s planted, people coming to Christ and baptized, and we are about to be sent out to plant a GC in our home and neighborhood. We already have two families joining us that we will send out to plant new GC’s. Since there are about 50,000 people in the tri-cty area (Mt. Dora, Eustis, Tavares) we hope and pray to plant 50 GC’s, 1 per every 1000 people and then 300 for the 300,000 people that call Lake County home. This is a huge goal that only God can accomplish and we need prayer and funding to make this happen.

Secondly, we are still working on helping parents through our weekend conferences. So far we have co-taught three Empowered Parent Confernces with the founder Glenn Ellison; on our own, lead three EPC’s, been to four Camp Consequences, helped over 20 parents & 22 children on our own and over 60 parents/children with Glenn.

The biggest issue that we are facing is marketing. The last two months, February and March, we haven’t had any parents sign up.  While we have had a great start, I needed to get a part-time job to bring in some finances. This has really cut into my “hitting the streets” marketing. We are discouraged but keeping our heads up. Glenn Ellison has a life-changing program for families and we are thankful to be apart of it. Hope and I feeling strongly about this ministry and are trusting God is going to provide, which brings me to my last area. 

We have been working on a 3-4 hour, Gospel-Centered Parenting class. I traveled to Denver for a men’s conference in January and also taught an hour class on parenting. This gave us the idea of doing this in local churches and give parents a taste of what we do. We hope this would help get the word out and feed our EPC’s where parents can get more training. We are also looking at doing some free, one hour, classes at local libraries and community centers. I have a couple of conventions that we would like to attend to promote and market what we do for churches. 

Thank you so much for your finance support and prayers. We need more of both!

Grace and peace,

Jesse, Hope, Justus, & Elli Kegg.

Timeouts

Have you ever placed your child in a timeout? What about your teen? We have hundreds of parents that put their teenagers in timeouts. One minute per year, so a 13 year old would spend 13 minutes in timeout. And here is the good part, they work!

One of the reason that parents fail is that they are not consistant with disciple. "I not going to put my child/teen in a timeout, they are to old for that." Let me ask you this, so what are you doing? and how is that working for you?

In order to change unwanted behaviors in your child/teen you have to be consistant. Most teens do two things, disrespect adults/parents and blow up in anger. When the child/teen disrespects the parent or yells in anger, parents react in the same way. And so we teach our children to yell and scream. One reason for the timeout works is they help the child/teen to calm down and the parent. Then you can have a calm conversation with your child.

Also a timeout fits the way a child thinks, here and now not a week from now. Children/Teens live for today. A 13 minute timeout is more doable than a weekend restriction. It also teaches them to respect you as the parent. We teach this powerful method at our Empowered Parent Conferences. We have parents that almost never place their children on a weekend or weeklong restriction because they have mastered timeouts, even with 17 years old!

To Denver and back.

This past weekend I took a trip out to Greeley, Colorado just north of Denver. For a Florida boy it was cold!

I had the opportunity to speak at Journey Christian Church's Men's Conference and lead a class on parenting with dads. "How to give kids the right attitude."

One thing that is common across the country is that kids are way different than when I grew up. They are different even after being out of youth ministry for 7 years. Our kids have changed in so many ways but there are some things that are the same.

1. We have to tell our kids that we love them everyday.
2. As a parent YOU NEED A PARENTING PLAN.
3. Parenting is hard work, period.

Even though most of what Hope and I teach is geared toward parents of strong-willed children, the parenting skills that we share are good for compliant children too. We help give parents a plan and hope!

Only One.

Wednesday night we started parent support. In support we coach parents after they attended a weekend conference. This past weekend we had 9 parents come. Some were out of town and others were local. Weekly support is a huge deal because this is where the real work begins. This is where parents get hope. This is where behaviors are changed.  This is where they become Empowered Parents.

So, Wednesday night began with one parent. 

One parent who loves her son. One parent that is ready to do whatever it takes. One parent who knows she's not alone anymore. One parent who makes our job worth having and doing!

That's why our motto at Empowered Parents is...Changing families, one parent at a time.

Children need Love & Affection

"Simply loving children is not enough. Parents' love for their children must be expressed." page 3 Parent Project.

One of the key elements to being an effective parent is love and affection, telling your children that you love them. In order to have better communication and discipline in your home parents need to display love and affection. To often we don't tell our kids how we feel about them. It is vital we do this. The Parent Project says this:

"Children are now centered. They seldom think of the future and do not hold on to parental messages from one day to the next. For these reasons, most experts agree parents' love for their children should be communicated daily."


Parent, you can do this. Tell your child, your teenage, that you love them. Give them hug before they go to school. Write them a note and leave it in their room. Tell them you love them before they go to bed.  Most of the parents we work with start to regularly tell their strong-willed child that they love them and see changes in behavior immediately.